The only reliable way to hire Private Domestic Staff is to base your decision on evidence rather than impressions, because charm and confidence can make someone appear competent in an informal interview.
DIOGENE Recruiting Intelligence uses structured behavioural interviews and consistent scoring, enabling multiple decision-makers to compare candidates fairly and discreetly.
Why Informal Interviews Mislead
In private households, unstructured conversations tend to reward likeability and ‘good presentation’, but rarely test judgement under pressure, respect for boundaries, or consistency over long periods, during travel, with guests, and when granting access to sensitive areas.
This also creates a governance problem, as each stakeholder remembers a different ‘version’ of the candidate, meaning the final choice becomes a debate about impressions rather than evidence.
Behavioural Evidence Framework (Simple and Repeatable)
Use a behavioural structure to ground every answer in reality.
Start with the situation, then move on to the action and finally the result.
Situation → Action → Result
Probe for detail until the story becomes testable.
Use practical probes to reveal reality, not rehearsed answers.
- “What did you do first, step by step?”
- “What trade-offs did you have to make?”
- “Who disagreed with you, and how did you handle it?”
- “What would you do differently next time?”
Role-Specific Question Sets (Example for 3 Roles)
The question sets below are designed to highlight judgement, discretion and operational maturity in three common HNW and UHNW roles.
Estate Manager / House Manager
- “Tell me about a time when you inherited inconsistent standards among staff or residents. What changes did you implement within the first 30 days, and how did these improvements manifest themselves?”
- “Describe a vendor failure that escalated quickly. What did you do to protect the principal’s time and reputation?”
- “Tell me about enforcing a standard with a long-standing member of staff. How did you maintain your authority without causing long-lasting tension?”
- “Give an example of a situation where you had to limit the flow of information due to privacy concerns. What information did you share, with whom, and why?”
Nanny / Governess
- “Tell me about a time when a child became dysregulated and a parent was under pressure. What did you do at the time, and what happened afterwards?”
- “Describe a time when you disagreed with a parent’s instruction. How did you raise this professionally while protecting the child’s routine?”
- “Give an example of travelling with children. What did you prepare, and how did you maintain the child’s routine despite any disruptions?”
- “Tell me about a confidentiality boundary you maintained in a previous role. What behaviours demonstrate discretion on a daily basis?”
Housekeeper / Head Housekeeper
- “Describe the highest-standard home you have worked in. What does ‘excellent’ look like on a daily basis versus on a weekly basis?”
- “Tell me about a time you discovered a valuable or sensitive item. What did you do immediately, and what was the protocol?”
- “Describe a standards conflict with another staff member. How did you resolve it and ensure that things kept running smoothly?”
- “Tell me about a mistake you made. How did you communicate it, correct it and ensure that it would not happen again?”
Red Flags vs Mismatches (How to Stay Fair)
A mismatch is a capability that does not fit with your household model, such as pace, formality, travel requirements or reporting lines.
A red flag is a pattern that raises concerns about honesty, judgement, boundaries or reliability in a high-trust environment.
To conduct a fair investigation, ensure that questions are consistent across candidates and unnecessary data collection is avoided.
A privacy-first approach aligns with data minimisation, whereby only what is necessary for a defined purpose is collected and shared.
How DIOGENE Scores Consistently Across Decision-Makers (Sample Rubric)
DIOGENE Recruiting Intelligence standardises evaluation by scoring the same criteria, the same way, across interviews — so stakeholders can compare like-for-like rather than “who felt nicest”.
Criterion | What “5/5” Sounds Like | Score (1-5) |
Judgement Under Pressure | Clear steps, trade-offs, calm escalation, lessons learned | |
Discretion Behaviours | Need-to-know reflex; concrete boundary examples; no oversharing | |
Standards Consistency | Systems/checklists; repeatability across busy periods and travel | |
Communication & Feedback | Specific, respectful, non-defensive; documents and closes loops | |
Team Impact | Low-drama leadership; resolves conflict; protects service rhythm |
How to Start (Intake)
To begin, request a confidential intake via:
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Francesco De Biase
STAY SAFE | RECRUIT SAFE
Contattami per Parlare delle Tue Necessità
Francesco De Biase – C.E.O.
Uff. (+39) 02 80888425
STAY SAFE | RECRUIT SAFE
Contattami per Parlare delle Tue Necessità
Francesco De Biase – C.E.O.
Email: clienti@thexerendipity.com
STAY SAFE | RECRUIT SAFE
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E-Mail: selezione-personale@thexerendipity.com